If all you’re doing is kissing your spouse good-bye on the way out the door in the morning and then once again before turning out the light that night, you’re not really showing love. You’re just going through the motions. Get creative, become a student of your spouse. What would really demonstrate your love to them in a way that words never could? Find out and go for it!
Though men and women certainly have their fair share of differences, this is one arena where they are very much alike. All of us want to be shown love. As much as we love to hear the words (and don’t get me wrong, saying the words is also very necessary), we have got to put actions behind the words! From leaving little love notes in your spouse’s briefcase or purse to surprising them with lunch at their office or serving them breakfast in bed, demonstrative love has almost limitless potential. You can plan a romantic evening, in or out (complete with child care, men), rent a movie that they would really enjoy, buy tickets to a sporting event or theatrical event that would please them, or just clean the house, do the laundry, or mow the yard, just so they won’t have to.
There is so much I could say about this subject, so many practical tips I could mention, but I’m writing a short devotion here, not a book. So, I must wrap it up. I want to say two more things in closing.
First of all, one of the biggest ways you can show love to your spouse is through encouragement. Notice the myriad of things they do and specifically thank them for their tireless devotion to you! Tell them in words, face to face. Buy them a thank you card and actually mail it to your own house for them to find in the mailbox and open. If you really want to earn some brownie points, praise them in public!!! Let them hear you genuinely appreciating them in front of others. Your words of gratitude and affirmation toward your spouse will not be mere music to their ears; they will be a symphony to their heart!
And lastly, I do want to point us back to the author of love and remind us of how God led by example when it came to not just speaking love, but showing love. John penned these words:
But anyone who does not love does not know God—for God is love. God showed how much he loved us by sending his only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life though him. This is real love. It is not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.
1 John 4:8-101 John 4:8-10
English: Contemporary English Version (1999) - CEV
8 God is love, and anyone who doesn't love others has never known him. 9 God showed his love for us when he sent his only Son into the world to give us life. 10 Real love isn't our love for God, but his love for us. God sent his Son to be the sacrifice by which our sins are forgiven.
WP-Bible plugin
Do you see the action demonstrated through those verses? Do you see how God took the initiative? And if you recall Romans 5:8Romans 5:8
English: Contemporary English Version (1999) - CEV
8 But God showed how much he loved us by having Christ die for us, even though we were sinful.
WP-Bible plugin, it says that God did all of this for us “while we were still sinners.” God didn’t wait until we had our acts together or until we proved ourselves to be lovable. No! He loved us even when we didn’t love Him! And even when we still fail to show Him our love, He never stops loving us! That is not only the reason we are to love others, but also the way we are to love others; sacrificially, unconditionally, and everlastingly. Especially our spouse!
practice
- Take a little time to evaluate how well you do in really demonstrating your love for your spouse.
- Ask the Lord to help you be more diligent in showing your spouse how much they mean to you. And if you’re at a point where you don’t “feel” like your spouse is worth your effort, ask God to rekindle that flame and fan it into a deep love.
- Find two or three things you can do this week to demonstrate love to your spouse, and follow through with them.
- Try to establish the habit of putting love into action rather than just putting it into words.
prayer
God, You who are Love, I need Your help! So often I am so totally consumed with ideas of how I want to be loved by my spouse, that I don’t take the time to love them first. Please forgive me for forgetting that marriage isn’t about what I can get, but rather about what I can give. Please help me to be a giver of love to my spouse. Please help me to be thankful for them and for all that they do, not just for me, but for our family, and so many others. Help me to show my love through action and encouragement, and I pray that You will bless our marriage as a result. Please help ours to be a lasting, effective marriage that is joyful to us and pleasing to You. Your love is the key ingredient to any successful marriage, so please help me to always follow Your example and be willing to keep loving, even when I don’t feel like it. In Your name I pray, Amen.
This post was originally distributed through PDF in conjunction with the Wed-Locked series, February 12, 2007.
0 Comments.